I fell in love with a catholic school boy one crisp October evening. He wasn’t popular. He wasn’t flashy. He was just who he was. And every now and then, when the leaves began to change colors, I still feel like that young girl discovering something new, something exciting, something scary. And every now and then I hear his voice calling me crazy. I didn’t say it was perfect. I just said it was love.
Over my life span, Fall would constantly take on a newness in my life. I fell in love again as a teenager (this time with a dimple deep piano player who called me crazy too. Is there a theme here?) and that relationship changed my life. That same Fall, my father went into the hospital and that trip changed all of our lives. I pledged my sorority in the Fall. I made my first 4.0 in the Fall semester. Both of my children were born in Fall, my wedding anniversary is in Fall (as well as my parents). Miles went to heaven in Fall. I used to celebrate Pumpkin Spice Lattes in the Fall until I found out they contained dairy (kept wondering why I was getting sick after drinking them. Just thought I was drinking too many). And I’m not jealous of all of your Instagram pictures of you drinking them. Well, maybe just a little.
The truth is, other than dreading losing the sunlight earlier and not being able to wear my flip flops and tank tops, I long for Fall. I feel like it’s my celebration season. My work load slows down and I have more time to focus on me and what’s going on in this body and this complex mind of mine. I have more time for tea and phone calls. I have more time to dance and read. This year, my Fall resolution is to be more FREE.
I am so restricted….by my own doing. Everything has to be so “rigid’ and so “calculated.” Life (and my yoga training teacher said this about yoga last night but I think it applies to life as well) is a practice not a science. There is no “exactness” to any of this stuff. And I want to enjoy life, not let it have me in a choke hold. When I feel restricted, I get to a place of “all or nothing.” All or nothing in fitness and diet (and I mean the “way” we eat, not the “traditional” sense of diet) can break you. If I’m all in, I’m ALL in. I’m killing it at the gym and I am leaving no room for what I consider balance (not to be confused with just eating stuff that I know is going to make me sick and finding an excuse to justify it) at the dinner table. If I “mess up” then I just quit. That’s pretty much death. It’s the see-saw we find ourselves on and the one that eventually throws us off one end so hard that we end up in a hole we can’t seem to climb our way out of without gaining ten pounds along the way. Or losing our sanity. Some of you know what I mean. I want to live no calculate. I want to be like the leaves. They have a purpose and they look pretty on the trees but they are beautiful when they fall and change colors.
Life would be pretty boring if it were the same season all the time.
This Fall is starting off with the first weekend of my yoga teacher training (yay!), participating in the Global Mala here in Huntsville and several of us participating in the 100 lunge a day challenge posted by Active starting Monday (we will be talking about it on the Hip Healthy Chick Facebook page). I am finishing up mycoffee fast (thank God!), my sugar fast (that one hasn’t been too bad but I might eat something every now and then), bringing my first deliberate vacation since I have been in the fitness industry to an end (still worked but at least I tried) and am feeling pretty good about where this season is going. I’ve taken (not taught) yoga five days in a row (that’s a record!) and I’m ready to get my oatmeal going this morning and open the door and let the cool wind and rain hit me so I can say, “Here I am, Life! Let’s do this!”
Are you excited about Fall?
And, I’m also starting out Fall by giving something away! Congratulations to KMorrow on winning an Under Armour Sports Bra! E-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org to claim your prize.
(and major shout out to my friend/photographer Dana McCranie of Love, Louise Photography who took these and a majority of the professional photos on my website unless otherwise noted.)