Taking It Off….For Good

“Who in the hell do you think you are?”

It’s a line I’ve heard a few times in my life.  O.K.  more than a few.  Quite a bit.  It’s been said behind my back (so it was more like, “who in the hell does she think she is?”) but to my face (do text messages and e-mails count?) numerous times.  People are quick to “remind” me who they “think” I am, where I came from, what I have and what I don’t have, who “they” are in correlation to who I am and, yeah, who in the hell do I think I am?

I am mostly startled, disturbed, frustrated, saddened, angry and hurt when these words come from one person.  And I have heard them from her more times than I would like to admit.

Me.

And, lately, me, myself and I have been having it out.  Big time.

In the past few weeks, I have went from facing the possibility of walking away from fitness period (yeah, the private struggle I have yet to discuss) to not having time to eat because I was bouncing back and forth between interviews and e-mails about opportunities, new assignments and blogs and phone calls.  I went from feeling like I was the smallest goldfish in the pond to like, “Wow! What I am doing is really making a difference.”  And then the “nots” starting showing up.

  • “You’re not a trained dancer.”
  • “You’re not a 200 hour trained yoga teacher.”
  • “You’re not all the way in a size 4, Sister.”
  • “You’re not an exercise person by trade.”
  • “You’re not as educated on spirulina as you think.”
  • “You’re not as popular as other people on Facebook.”
  • “You’re not making the big bucks.  Stop while you’re ahead.”    

The list went on and on.  Who in the hell did I think I was, a girl who learned her choreography skills practicing with her girls in the confines of a housing project, taught herself yoga, was her own first personal training client without any formal training, learned what I could from who I could to transition to a healthy vegan diet, built a following based on more personal relationships than anything and went against the advice of just about every sane person in my life to follow my dream of doing fitness full time?

I am THAT girl.  Because I did it.  And I decided that I’m GOING to do it until I CAN’T.  That’s different than WON’T. Because releasing those NOTS sure did release a lot of tension out of my body and made way for me to see what I am going to do next.

“Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination are omnipotent.” ~Calvin Coolidge~
 

See, it’s not just because I’m talented.  It’s because I persistent.  Talent doesn’t build rapport.  Education does not guarantee passion.  And because I seek it ALL, I can take off these labels I have put on myself, do away with the one others try to put on me and live freely in the grace God has given me (it’s all grace) to be here doing what others don’t think I should have the privilege of doing, including myself.  

Here’s to believing in ourselves, our dreams, and me tearing down the walls of fitness, one confident step at a time.

This entry was posted in 2013, loveyourbody, motivational, self-inquiry, yoga. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Taking It Off….For Good

  1. Nicole says:

    Never stop writing these posts, either, please. 🙂