I am one of those people who feel like I have spent my entire life apologizing for everything I am or everything I wasn’t or for everything I wanted. I started lying to myself about my own story. Some days it was o.k. to tell people I grew up in a housing project. Some days it wasn’t. Some days it was o.k. to say I had battled anorexia and binge eating. Some days it wasn’t. Some days it was o.k. to say I hated exercise, resented it and would prefer to stay in bed with chips and guacamole. Some days it wasn’t. Then I realized I had to face myself in the mirror EVERY DAY. And that’s how I get “slim.” I shed the guilt.
And that’s the truth.
My “weight loss” story is not a secret. Most of my life isn’t to most people who’ve been around me for five seconds. 🙂 But, after having the opportunity to speak my real truth in front of 1,200 (and really even more through a live stream all around the WORLD) of my fellow Institute of Integrative Nutrition Alumni, I realized there was power in “my” truth. See, there are millions of people with weight loss stories. And there are millions of personal trainers, Zumba instructors, people who grew up in the projects, vegans, single mothers, former single mothers, people who’ve overcome self-esteem issues and eating disorders, make great kale salads, etc. but there is only ONE Tasha and my story is unique and is meant to reach people in only a way that I was meant to do so. God sets us up like that. I was amazed at the number of people who approached me after that two minute moment, including a gentleman who was able to talk himself through a breakthrough he had never had the freedom to do before all because of what I was willing to share about my life. And he was a health coach.
And here I had been, wearing bigger clothes because I was “apologizing” for being slimmer than some of my friends and it made them feel uncomfortable or not going places because I was “apologizing” for not just being vegan but for not eating most of the things that are served in places I was invited (and didn’t want to go anyway) or “apologizing” by staying in a box that others created for me (I would call this “playing small”) because it made them “uncomfortable” that I go out and make things happen for myself. Who am I to dim the light that God so graciously put in my life?
And the minute I stopped apologizing and walked fully into my truth, wore clothes that I liked, let my weave down if I wanted to :), sought opportunities that worked for me, said “no” when I needed to and accepted my life AS IS, no filter, the weight (yes, I mean body weight this time) started to come off without effort. I had enough energy to eat the right things add cook and participate in exercise without remorse and authentic enthusiasm. I stopped getting on the scale because I don’t want to apologize for being ANY number, high or low.
Is there an area of your life where you feel apologetic? This week, share your TRUE story with someone. Release the desire of feeling like you need to be someone other than who you REALLY are.