What The ?!?!?!?

I did keep my word about not getting on the scale for sixty days.  On the morning of my birthday, as promised, with the anticipation of the end of the world, I stepped on the scale. Every since I got back from Miami, my body hasn’t been right.  I haven’t been hungry.  I’ve missed a few classes because of that vacation and the holiday.  It’s been hot.  I’ve been tired.  I haven’t slept well.  My digestion has been off.  I have done too much running around.  I’m stressed. And ALL of these conversations occurred in the time span of me opening up the closet door and pulling out the scale.  I took a big girl breath (I mean, I had just turned 37) and got on the scale.  No real change.  But I started thinking.  And hard.  I needed to lose ten pounds to be where I wanted to be.  I put the scale up and got dressed.  Off to boot camp I went.  My body anyway.  My mind was stuck.  Why did I do that?

Every since that day, I have been having this on and off affair with the scale like I did before.  Did I not learn ANYTHING? I was burning up the Arc Trainer on Monday and eating lightly (but well) and feeling good about my jump start into my goals.  And then it happened.

I hopped my happy butt on the scale this morning, looking for validation and what in the ??????? I had gained two pounds. Are you serious?  Was this some type of joke?  It was 5:00 a.m. and too early to scream and throw a tantrum but I wanted to throw my tennis shoe across the bathroom.  But WHY was I mad? Truthfully, I know when I do too much cardio, I swell up.  I had not used the bathroom (T.M.I.) and I KNOW that the scale is not a true representation of my progress.  But I did it anyway.  What the ???????

Do you do that too?

I felt like I had just stuck a dagger in my own heart.  I was doing well and I let a piece of tin kill my joy.  Let me let you in on a little secret: THAT THING HAS NO POWER BUT WHAT YOU GIVE IT!!!!!!!!  And I am putting my power in this new pair of running shoes I bought because I am on a mission and I don’t hardly have time to entertain such thoughts.  I am going to keep up with my Vega Protein and products (that I need to order.  I would have time to do that if I stayed off that scale). I am going to keep my excuses to a minimum, my need for validation low (did that thing not say I burned 711 calories the other morning?) and my head on straight because I define my own journey and how I feel about it and myself. 

Are you addicted to the scale?  What will it take for you to step away? 

This entry was posted in fitness, measurements, weight loss. Bookmark the permalink.

Comments are closed.