“Do you know where you’re going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you? Where are you going to? Do you know? Do you get what you’re hoping for? When you look behind you, there’s no open doors. What are you hoping for? Do you know?”
If you feel unsure about where you are headed but somehow feel “obligated” to make “resolutions” for 2012, you are not alone. EVERYBODY needs to change their life, right? We need more discipline, more order, more motivation, better attitudes, clearly defined goals and objectives, twelve month plans and the energy to do it all. We are going to become debt free, cellulite free, grab us a mate, an education, a six figure income and then beat up on ourselves at the first fork in the road, the first detour sign (for me, it usually starts to unravel somewhere around the third week of January) and then we give up and decide to start again January 1st of NEXT YEAR. We like the drama of a fresh start and the regulation of resolutions.
So, what if I told you that, as a person who makes a living as a holistic fitness specialist, assisting people with exercise, healthy eating and body wisdom habits, I am sitting in my pajamas, eating ice cream and cookies, day dreaming about a glass of wine and not really caring the least bit about how that “fits” into a resolution?
The world resolution means (this was my favorite): “the MENTAL state or quality of being resolved or resolute; firmness or purpose.” With that being said, I make a resolution EVERY DAY and it has NOTHING to do with “rules”. It’s about living life with a “mindset”; not with a checklist to keep track of how “inadequate” you are because you could not keep up with your own unrealistic expectations. If I told myself I could NEVER have a cookie, then I’d spend the rest of my life creating a life of deprivation. I can have anything I want. I choose, at any given time, to eat and drink what I want. It’s not because I work at the gym. It’s not because I no longer weigh 200 lbs. I can do those things BECAUSE I have chosen to live a life of freedom.
Let me explain.
You cannot stretch beyond what you already know and become who you really are if you are constantly trying to put “restraints” on yourself about who you think you should be. (And that’s not just “weight loss”. That’s life.) I was CONVINCED that breakfast made me “hungry” and that, if I ate it, I’d gain more weight because I’d spend the entire day eating food. The opposite was true. I followed the pattern of a lot of cardio exercise until I realized, one day, that weight training was BEST at getting MY weight down. I realized that when I don’t eat the right kind of food in the evening, I can’t sleep. I know what type of things I crave in the evenings after class but I only knew that because I didn’t just “traditionally” drink a protein shake. I open myself to STAND FIRM in my purpose DAILY. That purpose is to be healthy and happy. Some days it means getting up at 4:30 a.m. and praying. Some days it means sleeping late. Some days it means having a salad for dinner. Today, it meant eating cookies and ice cream. I have found a balance for my life by living each day individually and resolving to live my best life IN THE PRESENT, not holding myself by the neck for what I did in the past and not merely living my life for what “may be” in the future.
I do not say that to mean go out and eat at every buffet in town unless that serves your purpose. What I AM saying is that when you look behind you, there will be no open door because you can’t go back. You will never know where you are going to. Resolve to be here, living out your best life NOW. A sequence of days like that will set you up for the best possible position.
Rotate on your axis and go back to basics. Trust your instincts to lead you to what is authentically you. When you stop worrying about it, you can become it.
And you will not only LIKE the things life is showing you, you will LOVE it.